By Emma Brockes
At Manor Farm in Bedfordshire, Richard Brown is about to kill the last turkey of the season. It's an 18kg whopper, known in the business as a catering bird. Mr Brown has performed in front of witnesses before. A woman from environmental health once came and was sprayed with turkey blood when a vessel in the bird's mouth exploded in the final stages of strangulation.
"She was wearing a beige raincoat," he says. "Ready?"